I wrote this poem during a very frustrating period during rehearsal for Made of Stone. I have honestly never been so afraid to bring a character to life, and although I originally wrote this poem for myself, I felt an urge today to share it.

Sometimes I just want to scream

F*UCK IT!

Let it go.

Pictures of women standing in fields

with arms thrown wide

pasted all over the internet.

“10 Tips for Release.”

“The Secret to Success.”

Ribs cage me in.

I breathe and I can feel the pressure of

doubt, fear, self-mocking laugher

pushing up against my chest.

BREATHE!

I was told to suck in as a child

BREATHE!

When you stop breathing you stop living

BREATHE!

I know! You don’t have to f*ucking tell me again…

“Im blocked” I complain.

I don’t cry… bullshit.

I sobbed like a baby at the end of Toy Story 3,

and yet as I lay on my living room floor playing with

substitutions, parallels (whatever you call them)…

dry. Nothing!

Am I incapable of emotion?

Not just sadness but ANGER! Fear of making an impact.

Fear of being something to somebody.

A friend, a success, an ally, a supporter.

Do our words of encouragement mean anything if we don’t believe

that our words have value.

Is having an opinion something that’s self-important, or brave?

I dance in my kitchen to terrible music from the 90’s, and as I exit from

the front door I take with me a cage that keeps me grounded and safe.

Let it go.

To the little boy in the blue and grey shirt,

swinging on the sky train like a monkey,

thank you for reminding me that

LIFE IS MEANT TO BE FUN!

** This has been an original poem by Christine Bissonnette